Mental Health Archives - Musings by Danna

5 Best Self-Care Habits to Implement this Fall

I can’t believe that it’s finally Fall in this half of the world! I love Fall personally. It’s starting to cool down here, although it never gets too cold in Florida really.

Today I am going to be sharing with you five habits that I want to implement this Fall. Let me know in the comments if you will be trying out any of these this Fall or if you have any other ideas you would like to try out!

1. Spend more time being active.

I am so happy that the weather is cooling off (at least a little bit)! This means I can spend time in the great outdoors being active. My day job is as an elementary school teacher and I am enjoying recess with my students a whole lot more now that the weather is cooler.

I am also taking lots of time to play with my dog. Her name is Mia and she is a 1 year old blue merle goldendoodle puppy. She is wonderful and I love her so much! She has brought me so much joy these past few months since she was rehomed to me in May. We are still working on her leash skills but I am excited to be able to take her on more, longer walks.

I am also planning to start a gym membership soon! I am really excited to get back into the gym. I used to exercise all the time. Honestly, I was exercising way too much at one point in my life. But now, I have decided to embrace joyful movement versus trying to make my body look any certain way.

2. Spend time in my journal.

I have had the same journal for a couple years now. I got it from my grandparents a couple years back. While it’s not necessary to have a pretty journal, I do honestly believe that it can make it easier to get yourself motivated to journal with a pretty journal.

Journaling is integral to my self-care. It helps me to process my thoughts and get things out of my head when I am feeling overwhelmed. Don’t forget to grab my free journal prompts for mental health from this page if you’re looking for a place to start with journaling, or looking for a way to spruce up your current practice!

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3. Read a good book.

I used to be a voracious reader growing up, but as my mental health has become more complex, I have struggled with concentration which has made it harder for me to enjoy reading. In case any of you have struggled with that as well, here are a few things I have tried to get myself back into reading.

I read poetry. Since there are frequent opportunities to stop, I don’t have to concentrate for long. I read books with shorter chapters for the same reason.

I am also interested in accountability with reading, so I am thinking about starting up a book club again. It helps me to know that someone is going to know whether I read or not, and they’re going to care. I love discussing books so I want to be able to contribute.

4. Take a moment to reconnect with yourself.

For me, this often looks like meditating. I personally am a huge fan of Insight Timer. I use certain meditation music tracks from them for different situations. It is often helpful for me to get to sleep at night.

Something I am wanting to implement more of would be breathwork. This is a somatic practice that helps to release energy in your body. I have tried a couple pre-recorded sessions with Meleah from https://www.meleahrose.com/about and I highly recommend her sessions.

5. Give yourself permission to be creative.

This is something I have been working on a lot recently. It can be hard for me to be creative because of my perfectionistic nature, but I truly love my creative side and don’t want to dampen it due to perfectionism. I am working to challenge those thoughts.

One of the biggest ways I am creative is through my pen palling. I have pen pals all over the world and I enjoy getting to decorate their letters and write about what has been going on since we last spoke. It is truly one of the best hobbies I have ever had.

Another way I aim to be more creative this Fall is by taking time to draw on a more regular basis. I recently found my sketchbook and have been wanting to try out some new techniques. I have no formal training in art, but enjoy it nonetheless.

In conclusion

I hope you will join me in trying out some new habits this fall! Whether you plan to follow along with my habits or try your own thing, let me know how it goes. I would love to hear about it.

We can always continue our discussion in my Facebook group.

The 5 Best Distractions for Anxiety

Anxiety can feel completely overwhelming at times. Today, I am here to share with you my top 5 distractions for anxiety.

When to use distractions

But first, it’s important to talk about when to use distractions. It’s not a good permanent solution for anxiety because if you keep distracting from the problem, you never deal with it.

However, there are also times when you may feel too overwhelmed to deal with what’s causing the anxiety. Or, you may not be in a situation where you can immediately deal with it. In this case, distractions for anxiety are an appropriate course of action.

My top 5 distractions for anxiety

Now for the good part. Let’s talk about some of the best ways I know to distract yourself from anxiety.

1. Meditation

Meditation is a great way to distract yourself from anxiety. It can really help you focus on your breath. This can be hard when you’re feeling anxious, but is one of the best ways to deactivate fight or flight so you can really relax.

I recommend using the app Insight Timer if you are looking for guided meditations. There is a paid version but the free one works just fine. Some people also like Headspace, but there are more free guided meditations on Insight Timer.

2. Art

Art projects definitely distract me from my anxiety. Once I am focused on the art project, everything else seems to fade away from my attention. I become immersed in the world of creation.

It doesn’t even have to be good. It just has to be something to get you out of that anxious feeling.

If you’re looking for ideas of types of art to do, you could draw, paint, collage, or even start an art journal.

3. Count backward from 300 by sevens

This is maybe not the most fun distraction, but it does keep your mind focused on something other than the anxiety.

It can be very useful, especially when you are in a place where your usual distractions are not available to you. For example, you could use this in public settings more easily than the other distractions.

4. Joyful movement

Are there any forms of movement or exercise that bring you joy? For me, this is going on a walk with my dog. I also enjoy hiking, although I haven’t gone lately.

For some people, it may be swimming or running. It could be playing volleyball or going surfing. Any kind of movement that is actually enjoyable for you counts.

Exercise produces endorphins, which can make you feel better. It can also help burn off the extra stress hormones. While I don’t encourage unhealthy amounts of exercise, I do think there are benefits to moving your body in a joyful way.

5. Cuddle a pet or stuffed animal.

Physically touching something, especially something soft, can help ease feelings of anxiety. Cuddling also releases hormones that make you feel better.

My dog, Lily, will perform deep pressure therapy when my anxiety gets too high to help me calm down by essentially putting pressure on me until my heart rate, blood pressure, and breathing are under control again.

But even if you don’t have a dog trained to do something specialized like that, spending time with your pet can still be quite helpful.

Final thoughts on anxiety distractions

Distractions are very useful in the moment when facing intense anxiety. However, I would also advise you to take the time to sit with your feelings when it is safe to do so.

This will allow you some time to explore where these feelings are coming from. It will also allow you to search for more permanent solutions so that you don’t need to use distractions so often.

I hope that you found this post to be useful! As always, I welcome any feedback.

Until next time,

Danna

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Recognizing Red Flags in a Relationship

Have you been looking to get better at recognizing red flags in a relationship? If so, you’re in the right place.

Today, we’re going to be discussing red flags for all types of relationships because it’s not only romantic relationships that can be toxic.

Let’s dive in and discuss these traits to watch out for.

They’re controlling.

If someone else is in control of your life, it’s going to make it very difficult to be happy. Some things a person may try to control are:

Who you spend time with or talk to
Where you go
Your career path or major in college
What you do with your free time

When you find this happening, it’s important to think about what you want in life. Are your desires in line with your actions? If not, it may be time for a change.

They’re emotionally manipulative.

Consistently feeling guilty is a huge red flag in a relationship. Even in healthy relationships, you may feel guilt on occasion. However, it is not a consistent feeling that comes up when you think about a healthy relationship.

This guilt isn’t coming from nowhere. It is what the manipulative person is using to keep you “in line”, so to speak. If they can make you feel guilty, then they have more leverage to manipulate you into doing what they want.

They seem unable to control their anger.

Many toxic or abusive people are, in fact, able to control their anger. You can see this by the fact that they do not act this way around everyone they meet every time they are angry. This would suggest that an abusive person chooses to take their anger out on the person they’re abusing.

Even if you truly believe that someone is unable to control their anger and that they are trying their best, you are under no obligation to stay in that relationship, whether it is romantic, platonic, or familial. You are not required to wait around for them to change.

They may change.

They may not.

You are not responsible for their feelings. They may try to guilt you into continuing contact that you do not want. I want you to know that there are always options.

They blame you for things that aren’t your fault.

Blaming you for things that aren’t your fault is a definite red flag in a relationship. This is generally used to make you feel bad about yourself and not trust your decisions.

It can be challenging to trust your decisions if something is always said to be your fault after you make a decision.

For example, if you make a decision to take your child to the playground and they fall and get hurt, you may get blamed for that since it was your decision to take your kid to the playground in the first place. Then, you start to question if you made a bad decision.

This can result in you not trusting yourself to make future decisions, which can make you feel dependent on the other person. In a toxic or abusive relationship, they will want you to feel dependent on them. It will give them more control.

Their apologies are not sincere.

This can look a few different ways. One way it may look is them saying something along the lines of, “I’m sorry, but…”

They may also say something like, “I’m sorry you feel that way” in response to you bringing up a concern about their behavior.

Or, they may use the apology to guilt you by saying, “I’m sorry I am such a horrible person.”

None of these are real apologies. They may legitimately believe they are real apologies, but they don’t contain the components of a real apology.

So, then what are the components of a real apology?

Take responsibility for your actions – Tell the person you hurt that you are sorry.
Make it clear what you’re apologizing for – Tell them specifically what you are sorry for, such as making a rude comment at dinner.
Focus on how you hurt the other person, not your intention – Even if you didn’t intend to hurt them, you should not make statements like “Well, you know I didn’t mean anything by that comment.” Instead, focus on their feelings and perspective, saying something like “I understand why my comment at dinner was hurtful. I shouldn’t have said it.”
State how you plan to act differently in the future – This is where you state your intent to change to avoid hurting them in the same way in the future. For example, “I won’t comment negatively on your body in the future.”
In many cases, ask for forgiveness – You don’t want to demand forgiveness, but it is okay to kindly let the person know that you’re open to receiving it when and if they are ready to give it. Understand that they are not required to forgive you.

If these components are not present in the apologies you receive, they are likely not very sincere. While everyone makes mistakes with apologizing once in a while, if it is consistently happening, that is one of the major red flags in a relationship,

They gaslight you.

In other words, they try to make you question your reality. They may say things such as, “I never said that.” even if they did say exactly that. Or they may also say, “You’re just being so overdramatic.” which can lead you to question the severity of the situation.

Many of the above topics are also more specific examples of gaslighting. Sometimes people just want to have control over you, but it is not okay if you are being treated this way.

So, what can you do?

I feel as though the decision of what to do if you find yourself in any kind of relationship that is toxic is a very personal decision. You are the one who will ultimately have to live with the results.

However, if you have a desire to leave such a relationship, there are resources that can support you. Reach out to your local domestic violence shelter if the relationship is becoming abusive and is romantic in nature. If you are in the United States, you can find a very useful resource here with a hotline you can call, text, or chat with online.

I would highly recommend speaking with someone outside the situation. By this, I mean someone who doesn’t know the other person so it is way less likely that it would get back to them.

Make sure you are taking care of yourself and that you are safe, okay?

Final thoughts

It is not your fault if someone is treating you badly, but there are things you can do to help prevent it from happening in future relationships.

Mostly, this looks like setting strong boundaries from the beginning of a relationship (any kind of relationship) so that you know up front that they are more likely to be respectful of your boundaries.

If you are interested in doing some further work on this, learning how to set boundaries is one thing we can cover in private, 1:1 self-care coaching. Please feel free to reach out to me at danna@musingsbydanna.com with any questions about this program.

Until next time,

Danna

Six Depression Symptoms You Don’t Know About

Depression can be sneaky. Here are some symptoms of depression that you might not even recognize as being related to depression.

Body aches

Your whole body may just hurt whenever you are depressed. I experience this a lot. I didn’t realize until recently that other people experience this too.

However, it can also be a symptom of physical illness, so make sure to get this checked out by a doctor especially if it is ongoing or concerning to you.

This pain often interferes with my desire to do pretty basic things. I have tried some ways to cope with it such as walking and yoga. While it helps with this symptom of depression, it doesn’t make it go away.

However, it does at least lift my mood, and I can’t complain about that.

A physical feeling of heaviness

This lesser known symptom of depression ties in with the body aches for me. I get a feeling of heaviness in my whole body, but especially in my chest.

It can make it very difficult to want to get up and do anything when it may feel like your whole body is physically weighed down.

I have found that activities that lift my mood even just to being less depressed can help significantly with this symptom of depression. Think of activities that will make you laugh, but don’t take a lot of energy to start such as looking at memes or watching a comedy.

Sensitivity to rejection or criticism

This depression symptom can be very difficult to cope with. The reality is, sometimes we will not meet other people’s standards and we will face rejection and/or criticism sometimes.

However, for people struggling with depression, this can feel like the world is ending. We may feel as though our worst fears about ourselves have been confirmed.

Some of us may even experience Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, or RSD. You can read up on that here.

One way I know of to cope with this depression symptom is to work on your own self-talk and feelings about yourself. If you feel more positively about yourself, you won’t feel like your worst fears are confirmed when you face criticism. This is probably the hardest change for most people to make when they’re dealing with depression.

Fatigue

One of the symptoms of depression is feeling completely exhausted and wiped out. You may feel like there are a million things needing to be done but you can’t work up the energy to even do the most “basic” things, like taking care of your hygiene.

This happens to me a lot. Sometimes I will feel the need to sleep fourteen hours or even more per day. It’s not because I am lazy. I am simply that exhausted. Sleep can also feel safer than being awake for people struggling with depression, so that is something to keep in mind as well.

With this symptom, a big part of it is knowing when giving yourself a break or resting is beneficial and restorative versus when it is causing you to sink deeper into your depression. If it is the first, it is okay to give yourself a break when you need it. If it is the second, try to push yourself to do something small but productive even if it is only for five minutes.

Brain fog

Brain fog is one of the cognitive symptoms of depression. You may experience memory problems or an inability to focus. You may also lack concentration or the ability to think clearly.

I personally experience all four of the subsymptoms of brain fog. I struggle to read or write for long periods of time which is especially challenging as a student and a blogger.

Brain fog can also be related to things other than depression, so I would also recommend talking to a medical professional to rule out other possible causes. Even if it is related to depression, you can still take steps to reduce its impact.

Some of the things I do that are helpful include making sure I get enough rest at night (for me this is at least 9 hours), taking walks or exercising, and making sure I add more nutrient-rich food to my diet when it gets really bad.

Feeling numb

It is often assumed that depression is mostly feeling very sad, but that is not always the case. Sometimes, one of the symptoms of depression is feeling nothing. You may just feel indifferent or numb to the world.

I tend to alternate between the “sadness” type of depression and the “numb” type of depression. Sometimes it is related to medication changes, sometimes it has to do with my circumstances, and sometimes it just is that way.

Some people who do know about this symptom also assume that feeling numb is better than feeling sad, but the truth is, both can be equally awful. Depression is unique to the individual experiencing it in terms of which symptoms feel worse to them.

If you are feeling numb, I recommend you do something that will cause you to feel something, even if it is very temporary and just to show yourself that feelings are still possible. You could watch a funny show or maybe eat your favorite dessert. You could also try getting in touch with nature if that is usually joyful for you. It’s all about feeling something positive, if even for a moment.

Final thoughts

Depression has some symptoms that are less obvious to most people. It’s important to be mindful of these symptoms as well, though.

Keep your coping tools handy and know that you have the power to fight back against depression.

You have more power than you realize.

I would also love for you to check out my 17 Journal Prompts for Mental Health. They can help you learn to cope with many of the symptoms listed above and more!

Until next time,

Danna

Goal Setting For Mental Health

Goal setting is vital to your mental health. If you have no direction, this can greatly increase feelings of depression, hopelessness, and anxiety.

I know that goal setting can be a challenge for some people and some people even feel that it is altogether not right for them. I hope this post helps alleviate some common worries people have around goal setting.

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Goal exploration and choosing goals for mental health

Before you begin setting goals, it is a good idea to examine what is important to you so that the goals you set are relevant to your desires in life. There are a few things to think about with this.

First of all, think about where you see yourself five or even ten years from now. What kind of life is this future you living? If that’s too far into the future to think about, then try thinking about one year in the future.

Second, have you considered goals for different aspects of your life? I tend to base my goals off a welless wheel with seven dimensions. These dimensions are:

Physical
Social
Spiritual
Environmental
Intellectual
Occupational
Emotional

However, you may also create your own categories as you see fit. While it is okay to have the categories not in perfect balance, you can’t let any of the categories slide too far before it starts to impact you negatively. This does not mean you need to set a goal in each category, but you do need to be attending to all of them on a regular basis. You can do this with habits, which we will talk about later.

If this seems like an overwhelming amount of stuff to think about, I really suggest journaling it out. This should help you gain some clarity around what is important to you and what is not.

You can also try another fun journaling exercise to get clear on your goals. Essentially, you just write about your day as if you are the future you who has reached your goals. Write about what you would do every day and what you don’t do anymore. This one can be really eye-opening.

When you feel like you are ready to choose your goals, please remember that you don’t have to do everything at once. It is a better idea to choose 1-3 goals to work on at a time. The specific number will depend on how much time you have to devote to those goals right now and in the near future, how your mental health is doing, and how big each goal is.

You also want to make sure the goals you are choosing are something you have significant control over. One example of a goal you don’t have much control over would be winning the lottery. It would be better to set a goal where you are in the driver’s seat.

Milestones

Milestones are sort of like mini goals that make up your bigger goal. It is common to have monthly and/or quarterly milestones for your goals.

For example, maybe you’re planning a wedding. Your milestone for the first month might be to find a location for the wedding.

Milestones are important for a few reasons.

First, they keep you on track to reach your goal. If you have a long-term goal, this can be especially important since many of us have a tendency to procrastinate.

Second, they allow you to check in with your progress along the way and reward yourself.

Third, they help you plan to ensure that you have enough time set aside to reach your goal.

Habits

Habits are things you can do at regular intervals (meaning daily, weekly, etc.) that move you closer to your goals. Now that you have established a goal or two, let’s think about what you can do regularly to achieve that goal.

For example, if one of your goals is to write a novel this year, perhaps your habit could be to spend one hour per day writing. It could also be to write a certain number of words per day.

You can have multiple habits for the same goal as well. Maybe in addition to your hour per day writing, you also have a weekly research session to research anything you need for upcoming scenes you plan to write the following week.

You can also have habits in areas of your life where you don’t have a specific large goal to work on right now. One example of this could be in the social category. Maybe you make a habit of reaching out to a friend once a week to stay in touch even though you don’t have a specific goal in this area. This is a way you can balance the different dimensions of wellness without overloading yourself with too many goals.

Reward yourself

An important part of setting goals is deciding how you will reward yourself upon completion. There is a vast array of possibilities for this, which makes it possible to customize it to fit your needs.

Maybe you’ll reward yourself by buying yourself that new pair of shoes you’ve been wanting or a new game that just came out. Just make sure the reward isn’t something that you’ve already decided you’re getting either way.

This isn’t to say you can’t do nice things for yourself if you aren’t reaching your goals, but I am suggesting you only have the specific reward you choose if you reach your goal.

You can also use rewards for your milestones and/or for completing a habit for a certain amount of time. For example, if your goal for the year is to write a novel and your goal for the month is to write 15,000 words of that novel, it would still be appropriate to reward yourself at the end of the month if you wrote 15,ooo words. Likewise, if you plan to write an hour per day and do that for a week, perhaps you’ll give yourself a small reward.

Recap: Goal setting for mental health

Goals can improve your mental health by giving you a direction and something to strive for in life. Often, part of depression is feeling hopeless and lost in life. Goals can help with that.

Make sure you brainstorm ideas for 1-3 goals to work toward at a time. They should be aligned with what you want out of life. It’s important to not overwhelm yourself with too many goals.

Milestones can help you plan ahead, reward yourself, and keep on track to reach your goal.

Habits are things you do at regular intervals (daily, weekly, etc.) that help you to either reach your larger goals or to take care of other areas of your life.

Rewarding yourself for reaching your goals is an important part of the process. It helps motivate you when you may be struggling to find the internal motivation on some days.

Goals have vastly improved my mental health, even though I don’t always reach them. I love to dream big and have stretch goals while also maintaining more realistic expectations of myself.

Allow yourself to dream.

Until next time,

Danna

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How To Create An Evening Routine You’ll Actually Stick To

Who else here struggles to stick to a routine? I know it can’t just be me. Today I am going to walk you through some tips to creating an evening routine you’ll actually stick to.

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Why create an evening routine?

Structure – Evening routines can help you develop more structure to your life in these chaotic times we’re living in.
Sleep – You will sleep better if you create a purposeful evening routine to help you get to sleep.
Me time – If you schedule time aside to spend on yourself, you are much more likely to do self-care.

Parts of an evening routine

The parts of an evening routine are flexible and pretty much up to you. Here are a few things that I would personally recommend including.

Self-care time

This is when you should be doing things you enjoy doing. Think about what your hobbies are. Think of things that you don’t usually have the time for. This is when we are going to make time for those things.

Some things that people do for this are reading, art activities like painting or scrapbooking, or even crocheting. There are so many possibilities. It’s up to you to decide the best activities for yourself.

Prepare for the next day

This includes things such as cleaning up so you don’t wake up to a messy kitchen, setting out your clothes the night before, and planning out your next day.

This will result in a smoother morning which will make your entire next day go so much better. I highly recommend including this step. Even though it may seem small, it really does make a big difference.

Gratitude

Take time to reflect on your day. What are you grateful for? What went well? If you would like to dig into more gratitude exercises, I have a whole post about gratitude journaling here.

Hygiene routine

You’ll want to make sure you schedule in time for any hygiene-related activities you do before bed. These are things such as showering, a skincare routine, and brushing your teeth.

You may be used to doing these sorts of things right before bed, but it would be more effective to do some relaxation exercises right before bed.

Relaxation and wind down time

Your relaxation and wind down time is when you will be doing things that will help you to feel calmer so that you will have a better chance of falling asleep. You may be interested in trying some mindfulness activities for this, which I think is a great idea.

One really useful mindfulness activity for sleep is meditation. I really like Yoga Nidra guided meditations for sleep, which you can find on Insight Timer. If you’re interested in reading more about meditation, I have a post about it here.

You may also consider yoga. Yoga with Adriene on YouTube has a lot of excellent videos. I don’t do yoga very frequently (though I would like to) so I am not sure how many of her videos are more about exercise versus sleep, but I do know she has some relaxing ones.

Warm tea is another excellent option to wind down. Make sure you get something decaffeinated and that it has no contraindications with any medications you may be taking. My favorite is lavender and lemon balm tea. (If you choose this option, I highly recommend brushing your teeth again.)

If you aren’t into any of the above suggestion for relaxation, you can always at least practice some deep breathing. If you have other relaxation ideas, I would love to hear them! Comment on this post or feel free to email me. My contact information can be found here.

Go to bed

And finally, it’s time to end the day and go to sleep. Get comfortable and catch some zzz’s.

Sleep hygiene tips

Follow these tips for a more restful night’s sleep.

Limit caffeine intake. Avoid it entirely at least 6 hours before bedtime. Caffeine is a stimulant that can keep you awake. In case you didn’t know, it’s in chocolate too.
Go to bed and get up at the same time every day. This kind of consistency keeps your circadian rhythm in check.
Avoid using the bed for activities other than sleep. Your brain will associate your bed with the activities you do there, so if you work on homework in bed, your brain will think it’s time to be focused when you are trying to sleep.
Stay off electronics for at least two hours before bedtime. The blue light can keep you awake.
Avoid intense exercise for the two hours leading up to bedtime. However, light exercise such as walking, stretching, and most yoga exercises are unlikely to have an impact on sleep so they should be fine.

My new evening routine

So, I haven’t been following much of an evening routine lately even though I know I do better when I am in a routine. That needs to change. Here is the evening routine I am committing to trying for one week.

7:15 – Self-care time

I will be using this as my time to be creative. Some of the activities I may engage in include writing letters, art journaling, making friendship bracelets, or drawing.

8:00 – Prepare for the next day

I have been really into bullet journaling for a while now. I’m not particularly artistic, but it’s the functionality of the bullet journal system that appeals to me.

I will use this time to review any appointments I have written down for the following day, jot down a quick to do list, and get out my clothes for the next day.

8:15 – Gratitude

I will be using a method called GLAD Journaling to reflect on my day and practice gratitude. Basically, you write one thing you’re grateful for that day, one thing you learned, one thing you accomplished, and one delight.

More information on GLAD Journaling can be found in my post on gratitude journaling here.

8:30 – Hygiene time

This will be quick for me as I currently shower in the mornings. I will just need to brush my teeth, wash my face, and moisturize.

8:40 – Relaxation and wind down time

I will be using this time to do meditation. Like I mentioned before, I have really been enjoying Yoga Nidra on Insight Timer. I am sure there are also some excellent recordings on YouTube.

9:00 – Go to bed

I plan to be in bed at 9 pm every night. Hopefully I will be able to fall asleep quickly after the relaxation part of my evening routine. If I can’t, I will play some lo-fi music to help me fall asleep.

Final thoughts

I will be trying out this new routine for a week starting next Monday. I would love it if you would share your evening routine or try out a new one with me!

Until next time,

Danna

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5 Tips For Dealing With A Panic Attack

Panic attacks can feel completely terrifying. They may come on suddenly and leave you feeling completely drained. Today, I am going to share with you my top five tips for dealing with a panic attack.

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1. Grounding exercises

Grounding exercises are meant to bring you back to the present moment. They can stop you from having the intense feelings of a panic attack by helping you to realize the situation you are in is not actually dangerous, since most panic attacks happen due to benign situations.

There are a number of different grounding activities you might try but I will give you my top ten.

Squeeze something like Play-Doh.
Play with a fidget spinner.
Push your feet firmly into the ground.
Hold a piece of ice.
Listen to the world around you.
Recite a poem in your head or aloud.
Count backwards from 500 by sevens.
Describe your surroundings.
List information that is purely factual about yourself or the situation. For example, “I am Danna. I am sitting at my computer.”
Touch something soft like a pet or a blanket.

These are some things that can help when you’re in the midst of a panic attack and need to ground yourself.

2. Meditation or deep breathing

Meditation is a form of grounding but I felt it deserved its own space. Meditation has been helping me a lot lately. I think it’s great to use both in the moment of a panic attack, but also to help lower your stress levels to hopefully prevent future panic attacks.

I really like to do guided meditations, but you can also just use music or other techniques. My meditation app of choice is called Insight Timer. If you want to read more about meditation, try this post I wrote about meditation tips.

Meditation can be practiced in many situations, but for situations where it cannot, you can try deep breathing exercises.

Some people really like box breathing, where you breathe in for the count on four, hold for the count of four, then exhale for the count of four, and repeat.

3. Positive self-talk

Positive self-talk can be very effective for dealing with a panic attack. However, this is a technique you will need to practice in advance. Otherwise, you may not remember to use it in the midst of a panic attack.

There are several phrases you can use. Some include “I am safe” or “This will pass”.

One that works really well for me is to remind myself that I am having a panic attack and not actually dying. I also try to remind myself the average duration of my attacks to remind myself that it will end.

4. Exercise

I find that exercise can be a good way to get the adrenaline out of my system. I’m not talking hardcore exercises either, but if that’s your thing then go for it.

What I usually do is take a brisk walk. When I can, I will take another person with me. My dog usually comes along, too.

I also like to punch pillows or a target that I have from when I used to take Tae Kwon Do lessons. You may enjoy other options like yoga, taking a run, or even jumping on a trampoline. Just make sure whatever form of movement you pick is healthy for you and your body.

5. Talk it out

This is probably the most effective way for me to cope with strong anxiety. It’s obviously not always going to be possible as there may be times where you don’t have immediate access to other people. But when you can, it is definitely healthy to open up.

When dealing with a panic attack, it can be easy to share more than others are comfortable hearing. It’s important to be respectful of the boundaries of others. If you’re not sure if the person is in a good place to listen to you talk about anxiety, make sure you ask them first.

Some closing thoughts

Dealing with a panic attack is always hard, but I am hoping these tips today will help you to have a better handle on them.

Grounding, meditation, positive self-talk, exercise, and talking it out are all healthy ways of expressing your anxiety. I hope you will try at least one new technique and implement it into your life.

Until next time,

Danna

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Self Care on a Budget

For many of us, our wallet has gotten lighter recently due to the current situation. Today, I will be walking you through how to keep up with your self care on a budget.

But first, there’s something you need to do.

Make a budget

I know, it sounds obvious. But if you’ve never sat down and made a budget, there are a lot of things you could miss.

How to make a budget

My favorite way to budget is to create categories of things I may need or want to spend money on and then allot each category an amount of money based on my total amount I can spend for the month.

There are a lot more categories than one might think, so it’s important to honestly evaluate where you know you will spend money.

Let’s consider some categories.

Rent or dorm expenses
Electricity/Water/Sewer
Wifi
Cable
Groceries
Gas
Pet expenses
Health insurance
Car insurance
Phone bill
Money for hobbies
Money for miscellaneous fun things

Consider how much money you have total each month. Then, for each of those bills that apply to you and are essential, write in the amount you expect to spend. It is better to overestimate your expenses, rather than to underestimate.

Once you have the essential bills covered, see how much you have left over for hobbies or fun things.

At the end of the month, if you spent less than you thought you would, you can transfer a bit of money to your savings account so that you have a little extra money in case something goes wrong.

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Physical self care on a budget

There are so many ways to take care of yourself on a budget. People tend to focus on one area of self care and leave out others, but part of self care is being balanced.

Taking care of your body is something people tend to think is expensive, but it doesn’t have to be. Here are a few examples of ways you can practice physical self care on a budget:

Get outside: You could take a walk. You could go hiking or kayaking. Getting outside is a great way to soak up that vitamin D and get a mood boost.
Free online exercise videos: If you miss going to the gym, consider trying some free exercise videos online. There are lots of free videos on Youtube for all different types of exercise. I also have an app called FitOn with free exercise videos.
Work on your sleep habits: Do you bring your phone to bed? Are you staying up all night when you could be sleeping? Try to adjust your routine to allow for some time to wind down before bed. Make sure you’re getting 7-9 hours of sleep.

Mental self care on a budget

Journal: Take some time to pour your thoughts out onto the page. A daily practice of journaling is best, but even weekly will make a difference. I have a couple posts about journaling. You can find the one about gratitude journaling here and the one about journaling for anxiety here.
Read for pleasure: Find what kind of book speaks to your soul. Reading is a great distraction, whether you are reading fiction or nonfiction. It allows you to escape to another world and temporarily not worry about this one.
Group therapy: This option is almost certainly not going to be free, but it is usually significantly cheaper per session than individual therapy. You may also want to look into sliding scales for individual therapy. It is definitely still not the cheapest thing, but it can make therapy significantly more affordable.
Therapy workbooks: You can get a therapy workbook at a bookstore or online. The down side is you do need to know what you’re looking for to some degree. However, for example, if you know you want to work on anxious thoughts, you may be able to find a Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) workbook for anxiety.

Spiritual self care on a budget

Meditate: There’s lots of ways you can do meditation. You can read more about different meditation practices here. My favorite way to meditate is to use guided meditations. You can find some on Youtube. My favorite app to use for meditation is Insight Timer.
Find a hobby you’re passionate about: For some, this may be drawing. For others, it could be scrapbooking. My favorite hobby is writing letters. It brings me a lot of joy and I would encourage you to find something that brings you that much joy.
Try yoga: There are plenty of free videos online that can help you get started. All you will really need is a mat and potentially some blocks for certain poses, but you can start with just getting a mat. You will also need some comfortable clothes that have some stretch to them. If you don’t have any, consider shopping secondhand.

Additional tips for college students

Consider what your college may include with your tuition. Schools usually have some options to help students with their mental health. Here are just a few of the things that many schools include:

A gym: That’s right, you can work out in a gym without paying a monthly membership fee.
Individual counseling services: I honestly believe most schools don’t offer enough, but you can usually get 6-12 sessions for free depending on the school. If you have something really specific you need to work on, it may be enough.
Group counseling services: From my experience, colleges usually provide significantly more group sessions than individual sessions. They are likely to be on a wide range of topics.
A dietitian: This can be a huge difference for students with eating disorders. I do believe they can help anyone who is struggling with things surrounding food, whether they have an eating disorder or not. Not all colleges have this option, but many do.
Life coaching: Not all schools have this, but some have an option where you can work with a life coach for a semester or longer. I think this is a great option for a lot of people, especially those who don’t feel comfortable with the idea of therapy but need someone supportive in their life.
Student health services: Most schools have some sort of health services for students. This is important if you become ill while away at school or if you just need a routine exam completed. Different schools have different levels of care that they offer, so be sure to check what your school offers.
Campus events: They aren’t really happening right now, but when they do, there are a lot of resources you can take advantage of. Most campus events have free food. They also often give away small items like stress balls that could be used for self care. It’s a great time to socialize with others, too. There are also sometimes events with therapy dogs, especially around exam time.

Some final thoughts about self care on a budget

This list is by no means exhaustive. There are always options out there that can help you.

If you feel as though you need immediate help and you are located in the US, please reach out to the suicide prevention hotline at 1 (800) 273-8255. You can also reach out to the Crisis Text Line by texting SHARE to 741741. Both of these options are free as long as you are able to place calls or send and receive text messages on your phone.

As always, please share this post on social media if you enjoyed it. Don’t forget to sign up for my email list below to receive seventeen free journal prompts for mental health.

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How To Create A Morning Routine

Today, I would like to share with you how to create a morning routine by walking you through how I am creating my own new morning routine.

For those of you who don’t know, I recently moved for school. Between moving and school, a lot will be changing for me, so it’s time to revamp my morning routine.

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Why create a morning routine?

Some of you may not be know why you should create a morning routine. Why do the same things every day? Here are a few of my reasons:

It can be a time saver. You can get everything you want done quicker because there’s no debate about what to do next.
It helps you incorporate healthy practices into your day. When you have a routine, you are more likely to do these things regularly.
It allows you make time for what matters. If you schedule time for it regularly, it must be important to you.

My new morning routine

My morning routine will have to change to adapt to my new schedule. With that being said, remember that it is important to frequently evaluate your routine and make sure it is serving you.

Here are the things I plan to do daily in my morning routine:

Journaling

I want to journal every morning to just get all my thoughts out so I can go about my day with less stress.

For me, this will look like a practice called Morning Pages, which comes from the book “The Artist’s Way” by Julia Cameron. I haven’t actually read this book yet, but I have heard a lot about this practice and I would like to try it.

Essentially, it is three pages of stream of consciousness writing that you do when you wake up in the morning.

Of course, there are plenty of other journaling practices one could do in the morning. Some can be found in my post on gratitude journaling.

Take my medication

This is an essential part of my daily routine. I have to take my medication in the morning, afternoon, and at bedtime.

For people who struggle with their mental health, finding the right medication or combination of medications can be essential to recovery.

I would encourage you to search on Psychology Today if you are in need of a psychiatrist to prescribe medications. They also have directories for therapists and group therapy if you are in need.

Plan my day

For me, this looks like bullet journaling. For others, it may look like using a planner or time blocking on Google Calendar.

This keeps me on track to get everything that I need done so that I don’t miss any tasks, small or large.

I like to color code when I plan, so I will have different colors of pens for different types of tasks. Each of my classes starting later this month will likely get its own color assigned to it.

Eat breakfast

I never miss breakfast. It’s so important to your physical and mental health to be eating enough and part of that is getting in all your meals and snacks.

When I was younger, I struggled with an eating disorder. Part of not falling back into that is to make eating all my meals a non-negotiable habit.

I feel so much healthier now that I allow myself to eat whenever I feel hungry. Hunger is not the enemy. It’s just a signal from your body that you need food. It’s okay and even necessary to listen to that signal.

Take care of my dog

I am training a service dog to help me with my mental health. Her name is Lily. I walk her at night usually because it’s so hot during the day this time of year, but I still have to take her out and feed her in the morning.

I also like to give her some play time. She has a toy fox that she loves.

While training takes place randomly throughout the day, I do like to do some targeted training daily. Her training with tasks to assist me is going great, but we still need some work on public access skills since we haven’t been leaving the house except for essentials lately.

Follow my Instagram @musingsbydanna if you’d like to see Lily! I will be posting some videos of her soon, hopefully.

Exercise

This will be a new habit for me as well. I used to over-exercise when I had an eating disorder, so I will be monitoring this morning habit closely to make sure it stays healthy.

I got workout clothes today since I didn’t have any, so I am one step closer to starting this habit.

The benefits of exercise are more than just physical. I am much more concerned with how exercising may be able to help with my depression. I know I always feel better even after just taking a walk, so I am hoping that adding in an actual workout will make the benefits greater and longer lasting.

Shower and get ready for my day

Showering can be hard for those of us who have experienced trauma. If this is something you’re struggling with, I would highly recommend two things. First, wear an oversized shirt or swimsuit that you can wash under while you shower. Second, listen to something calming during your shower.

I am usually the type of person to shower at night, but with adding in a morning workout, I feel like a morning shower is going to be pretty important.

Then, I will move on to getting dressed and ready!

A final note on morning routines

Your morning routine doesn’t have to look like mine though. You should customize it to look exactly how you want!

Feel free to email me (my contact info can be found here) and let me know what you have done to create a morning routine or exercise routine that you love.

As always, please share this post on social media if you enjoyed it. And don’t forget to sign up for my email list below! I will be letting everyone on my email list know how this new routine is going soon.

Until next time,

Danna

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5 Tips for Dealing with Depression

Depression can be difficult to cope with. Today, I would like to share with you my top five tips for dealing with depression.

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1. Get the right amount of sleep.

This means getting enough sleep. It also means not letting yourself sleep too much. Staying in bed all day can have a really negative impact on your mood.

You’ll want to have some sort of evening routine to get your brain prepared for sleep. It doesn’t have to be a long routine. I will be talking more about evening routines in a coming post.

Avoiding depression naps will be very important. You don’t have to 100% abstain from napping, but you will want to limit it to when you are actually sleepy and feel like it will help you.

You’ll have to pay attention to your own body to learn when you are tired and need sleep versus when you are experiencing fatigue due to depression.

Getting the right amount of sleep is definitely one of my top tips for dealing with depression. It’s not always going to happen, but it’s important to do your best to stay balanced in this area.

2. Set and work toward goals.

These goals should be yours. They should not be focused on what others want or need from you.

They don’t need to be big either. Sometimes making a to-do list for the day and accomplishing some of it will count.

Your goals may be things you need to do, such as take a shower, do the dishes or take your medication. It’s okay if those feel like really huge goals when you’re depressed.

They may also be goals that you want to do like getting back into an old hobby or starting a new one.

3. Stay in contact with people you care about.

In other words, don’t isolate yourself. This can be super challenging when you feel depressed, which is why it’s one of my tips for dealing with depression.

It’s hard to talk to people when you’re depressed for a couple of reasons. First, you don’t have the energy. Second, you may not want them to see you feeling bad because you feel embarrassed or are worried they will be upset or judge you.

It’s important to challenge the beliefs you have surrounding these ideas. You need to remind yourself that people love you and want you around. It’s okay to be depressed and still be seen.

Try to make sure you’re reaching out to at least one person outside your household every day. If a phone call feels like too much, you can try a text.

Schedule out your social time so you can be properly rested and prepared for it. It’s okay to schedule phone calls with friends ahead of time. If they’re a good friend, they will understand.

4. Set a timer for fifteen minutes.

This is a great strategy when you’re feeling overwhelmed by a large or seemingly large task.

You can use this for things like chores you have to do, school work, or really anything.

This allows you to work for fifteen minutes and then take a break, so you don’t feel worried or overwhelmed by the entire task or set of tasks ahead of you. If fifteen minutes is too much for you at this time, try ten minutes or even five.

Getting anything done is better than getting nothing done.

You can also use this to try out a coping skill. Set your timer (depending on the skill, you may have to adjust the amount of time) and try it out. When your timer ends, evaluate how you’re feeling and if this skill seems to be helping.

If it didn’t help, you can switch to a different coping skill. If it seems to be helping, try to continue doing it for a bit longer.

5. Do things you enjoy without having to earn them.

Doing things you enjoy may sounds simple to some, but it can be really hard when you have depression for a couple of reasons. First, you may struggle to come up with the energy to get started. Second, you may not enjoy things the way you used to.

If you’re struggling with energy, I recommend trying the technique above about setting a fifteen minute timer. It won’t give you more energy, but it may allow you to change your mindset around the activity long enough to try it.

If you aren’t enjoying things, sometimes it’s just a matter of sticking with it. Keep trying to add small enjoyable activities to your days and don’t be afraid to try something new.

Another thing I want you to notice is that I said “without having to earn them”. This means you can’t just use enjoyable activities as a reward. You need to be actively building them into your schedule.

It’s important to allow yourself to do things you enjoy, especially when you’re depressed. Try not to feel guilty about all the “more productive” things you could be doing. Life is not all about who can be the most productive.

Some final thoughts

Depression is difficult to cope with. I hope these tips for dealing with depression will give you some new ideas of things you can do to improve your mood.

Depression is not a moral failure. There is nothing you did to deserve it. It isn’t your fault, but there are things you can do to fight back.

You’re going to get through this.

I hope you enjoyed this post and found it helpful! If you did, please consider leaving a comment or sharing a link on your social media. You can find my contact info here. And don’t forget to sign up for my email list below!

Until next time,

Danna

Don't forget to subscribe to our email list for weekly updates from Musings by Danna, plus 17 free journal prompts for mental health!